It's on the news, and it's in the paper often. Here's the debate- One kid- dangerously allergic to peanuts, other parents upset about the how 'a peanut free school' might affect their healthy kids.
The healthy kids- They like peanuts, and their parents hate the idea of banning them at school. OR, the parents hate the idea of requiring kids to wash their hands. There are no health related reactions that these children may experience in result of a peanut free campus. Could someone argue emotional results? Possibly. If your child would be traumatically affected, or become emotionally distressed because he/she can not eat peanuts at school- there is something else seriously wrong. Is it a pain? Maybe. If you slap some PB&J on a piece of white bread to throw in your child's lunch bag everyday, and you are upset about having to come up with something new, fine. I am sure the 5 year old with a deadly allergy didn't mean to 'upset your flow.' His/her parent could possibly spend hours, and 3 times as much money trying to create some sort of safe meal to pack in their lunch box. As much as I try to see every situation from both sides- let's be honest, you and your child will not suffer any physical or emotional damage because peanuts have been restricted from your child's school. I understand that you have no sympathy for the child who can never eat peanuts in her life, or the young'n who was rushed to the hospital, unable to breathe because her airways closed due to a peanut contamination. Ironically, I bet that child has more blind compassion for you then you'd imagine, while you continue to judge him/her. Please, try to put yourself in their shoes. Do you think that this child, or their parents, signed up for allergies? No, and thankfully, you or your children don't suffer from them as well.
As for the parents of allergic children- Yes, my son is home-schooled. He should have the right to a public education, but unfortunately, no school can accommodate him. I am a 24 year old, 100% single mother, with one income, no public assistance and I make it my job to home school him. I am not speaking from a lazy, inconsiderate, or needy point of view. I believe in taking necessary action to protect our children. For my child, homeschooling is necessary. For a child with an allergy to only peanuts, I would like to hope that public school is an option. If YOUR child was diagnosed with a disabling condition tomorrow that resulted in home-school as the only option; your choices would be to pay $18,000 a year for at home child care, or to quit your job to stay home with the child. I believe with personal experience, your strong and opposing opinions might change. My son has more than 40 food allergies, trust me I understand. I would hate for anyone to have to 'go out of their way' to have to accommodate him, or any other child with food allergies. But really, does keeping peanuts out of your lunch box mean going out of your way? Is being lazy, inconsiderate, or insensitive worth risking some one's life? You seem to be spending more energy picketing against it than you would be packing a peanut-free lunch. I've never heard anyone complain that the 'handicap gets the close spot,' or 'the ramp gets in my way.' Accommodating a disability affects you in such a small way, it's ludicrous to think of picketing, and protesting against a small child's disability and their rights to education.
Most adults can fondly speak of their memories as a child. We all remember our favorite teachers, and best friends growing up. 44% of your awake time as a child is spent with your classmates and teachers. Most can say it was their school experiences that molded and shaped them into the adult they are today. I know I can.
Children, by nature, are compassionate, selfless, and nurturing. When a child is hurt, their friends always offer hugs. When a child is crying, others are sympathetic, and share a moment of sadness. If you or your son/daughter would rather restrict an allergic child to a solitary education, with no friends, no licensed teachers to help educate, and no socialization; I recommend you take a moment to self reflect on your level of compassion and selfishness.
Monday, March 14, 2011
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Help along the way
There's a magazine intended for people with food allergies that I subscribe to. It's filled with recipes, cutting edge articles, and stories that a parent of an allergic child can relate to. I just opened up the newest issue to find a 3 page spread of a Mother's journey with dietary restrictions. Her child wasn't tested for a milk allergy, and he didn't have a dangerous anaphylactic reaction. Her son was diagnosed with severe, non-functioning autism. Severe enough that it was recommended he live in a group home for special care. I related to her immediately. Our boys symptoms are very different and unrelated, however, our jobs as Mother's is the same. I don't mean to compare, I know that I could not imagine being in this mother's shoes. But, Like myself, it became her job to relentlessly research her child's illness, and dedicate her time and energy to changing his diet, and surroundings. When this Mother learned that a gluten free, and dairy free can significantly improve behaviors and symptoms of autism, she dove in head first.
Often I hear people say "we try to eat gluten free," or, "we eat MOSTLY gluten free, because we don't really like bread...," or most often "we usually don't eat that but we were out, and there was nothing else to eat." Ironically, everyone who's ever said to me "that diet didn't work," also admitted that they cheated, and didn't follow the special diet strictly.
In the early stages of changing her son's diet- this Mother offered a strict diet of no gluten of dairy. She learned to bake gluten free cookies, and tried very hard to make something her son would choose to eat. He didn't. In fact, he did not eat for 2 days.
Of course we prefer our children to eat a healthy diet, every day. And, naturally, it would be easier to find something your child enjoys then sticking to a so difficult diet so strictly from the beginning, but I celebrate this Mom. When giving in is not in your child's best interest, it's best not to. It's a battle of the lesser evils. I may get some hate mail for saying this- but, if it means sticking to your guns to follow through with what's best for your child, be firm. You are the mother, you know what's best, and as hard as it may seem right now, your end result will be a healthier child. Like this Mother, say no, and don't give in. And I promise, when he's hungry enough for this face off to be considered dangerous, he'll eat whatever is in front of him.
Your life may no longer consist of last minute day trips, or quick fast food runs on your way home. Dealing with special diets will require more planning ahead, packing lunches, and 'bringing your own' where ever you go.
Special diets will mean learning how to cook.
It will mean saying no, and sometimes being 'the bad guy.'
There will always be controversy. This is one of the many controversial food allergy subjects. Some believe that 'depriving your child of dairy' because of behavioral issues is wrong, and some believe that not providing other food options is torture. There are parents that think that not allowing dangerous life threatening peanuts at school is not fair to the 'healthy kids'. There will always be resisters, and there will always be someone to push you, but what you're doing is right. And I don't mind being the one to say it!
So, to encourage those of you trying your best to help your children with special diets; You are a great parent. You want whats best for your child, and you want your little love to be healthy. You are doing well, and YOU know what's best. You've decided that a change in diet is better for your child then the chemical related side affects of ADD, ADHD, Allergy, Asthma, Seizure, or anxiety medications. You stick to your guns, and try to stay strong. I promise, it will get easier, and your child will get better. And I support you.
Often I hear people say "we try to eat gluten free," or, "we eat MOSTLY gluten free, because we don't really like bread...," or most often "we usually don't eat that but we were out, and there was nothing else to eat." Ironically, everyone who's ever said to me "that diet didn't work," also admitted that they cheated, and didn't follow the special diet strictly.
In the early stages of changing her son's diet- this Mother offered a strict diet of no gluten of dairy. She learned to bake gluten free cookies, and tried very hard to make something her son would choose to eat. He didn't. In fact, he did not eat for 2 days.
Of course we prefer our children to eat a healthy diet, every day. And, naturally, it would be easier to find something your child enjoys then sticking to a so difficult diet so strictly from the beginning, but I celebrate this Mom. When giving in is not in your child's best interest, it's best not to. It's a battle of the lesser evils. I may get some hate mail for saying this- but, if it means sticking to your guns to follow through with what's best for your child, be firm. You are the mother, you know what's best, and as hard as it may seem right now, your end result will be a healthier child. Like this Mother, say no, and don't give in. And I promise, when he's hungry enough for this face off to be considered dangerous, he'll eat whatever is in front of him.
Your life may no longer consist of last minute day trips, or quick fast food runs on your way home. Dealing with special diets will require more planning ahead, packing lunches, and 'bringing your own' where ever you go.
Special diets will mean learning how to cook.
It will mean saying no, and sometimes being 'the bad guy.'
There will always be controversy. This is one of the many controversial food allergy subjects. Some believe that 'depriving your child of dairy' because of behavioral issues is wrong, and some believe that not providing other food options is torture. There are parents that think that not allowing dangerous life threatening peanuts at school is not fair to the 'healthy kids'. There will always be resisters, and there will always be someone to push you, but what you're doing is right. And I don't mind being the one to say it!
So, to encourage those of you trying your best to help your children with special diets; You are a great parent. You want whats best for your child, and you want your little love to be healthy. You are doing well, and YOU know what's best. You've decided that a change in diet is better for your child then the chemical related side affects of ADD, ADHD, Allergy, Asthma, Seizure, or anxiety medications. You stick to your guns, and try to stay strong. I promise, it will get easier, and your child will get better. And I support you.
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Hero's
The FAAN has recently been focusing on educating friends and family of people who suffer from food allergy. Part of the focus has been on recognizing 'PAL's,' or people who "Protect A Life from food allergies.'
Again- this is why I blog. Educating just one person- helping someone know enough to save a life- is all I hope for. In support of the Food Allergy and Anaphlyaxis Network and their efforts, I would like to honor 3 special people with the PAL Hero award.
Again- this is why I blog. Educating just one person- helping someone know enough to save a life- is all I hope for. In support of the Food Allergy and Anaphlyaxis Network and their efforts, I would like to honor 3 special people with the PAL Hero award.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
the history of Gabriel
There will always be those who go against the grain. For some, it's only natural to debate and question the rest of society. For those few, agreeing may feel like submission, and the only way they feel satisfaction is to debate, and challenge even the most undebatable concepts.
In some ways- I too am a challenger. I challenged the doctors when they prescribed daily steroids. The thought of a 2 year old swallowing twice the adult dose of steroids that stunt grown, diminish calcium absorption, and a million other significant side affects was not an answer, for me. So I challenged, and I found a solution. I challenged the idea of feeding tube instead of an extreme and hard to follow diet. I challenged the doctors who thought it couldn't be done. It is the challengers that push the rest of society to find a better answer.
I encourage you to challenge me. Challenge me to learn more about the body and its disease, challenge me to learn more about the side effects of Gabriel's drugs, challenge me to prove my point in such a strong way that it is clear to the world. Challenge me so support a child as a single parent, challenge me to support a child with 3 separate disabilities as a single parent. It is overcoming challenges that creates growth.
In some ways- I too am a challenger. I challenged the doctors when they prescribed daily steroids. The thought of a 2 year old swallowing twice the adult dose of steroids that stunt grown, diminish calcium absorption, and a million other significant side affects was not an answer, for me. So I challenged, and I found a solution. I challenged the idea of feeding tube instead of an extreme and hard to follow diet. I challenged the doctors who thought it couldn't be done. It is the challengers that push the rest of society to find a better answer.
I encourage you to challenge me. Challenge me to learn more about the body and its disease, challenge me to learn more about the side effects of Gabriel's drugs, challenge me to prove my point in such a strong way that it is clear to the world. Challenge me so support a child as a single parent, challenge me to support a child with 3 separate disabilities as a single parent. It is overcoming challenges that creates growth.
Monday, March 7, 2011
Don't give up on spring time allergens
Not too long ago- an expert allergist told me that Gabriel has a strong reaction to grasses, and should avoid them at all expense. HA! You try being 4 and avoiding the grass. This allergist has been one of Gabriel's most reliable doctors for a long time, and he taught me something very valuable. Rarely does one allergen sen you over the edge. Allergies are like that arcade game- with the shelf full of coins, and you drop in coin after coin until they all pour over the edge. The shelf is full of hundreds of coins, and finally, that one single coin causes a ton to overflow. Allergies are just this way. You are irritated by many allergens, typically. And one by one they fill up the shelf. Finally, one little allergen, not necessarily your 'worst' pushes you over the edge. Suddenly your congested, itchy, wheezy, and rubbing your eyes. Although we tend to blame the last allergen we were exposed to, blame everything that filled up that shelf!
Through my research and experience I have learned these few but valuable tips to help keep your shelf empty. When your shelf is empty, one accidental exposure wont push you over the edge!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)