What's your Monster?

Gabriel and his cousin, Ryder, My monsters :)

Every experience, every treat and joy; and every dreaded fear, is based on our own personal experiences.  Its all relative to what we, personally, know.  What you don't know, you don't miss, and what went horribly once, we're scared to try again.  We all have our own monsters, so to speak, that we create, based off of our own fears, hates, and experiences.

I baked Gabriel bread last week.  No flour, no butter, or eggs.  No baking powder, and not much of anything.  I baked it for an hour, before I pulled it out and decided to put it back in.  The bread was gummy, and damp, no matter how long I cooked it.  When it was finally done, it felt like a brick.  Bread without the proper ingredients doesn't rise, and tastes similar to overcooked rice.  But Gabriel loves it.  We ran to the store to buy a toaster (since mine was contaminated), and he begged me to make another loaf.  Dense, soggy, brick toast, and Gabriel thought it was the best.


 It's true we choose our own monsters, but the same goes for our best's.  Whatever it is that makes you happy, or whatever may be the best that you've ever had, is your best.   I've never fully grasped how the best, the most elite, the greatest of any one thing, is different for everyone.  When something is truly the best, shouldn't everyone think so?  We don't ever agree on the best, because we've all experienced different things.  To you, Gabriel's bread wold most definitely be the worst bread you've ever tasted, but to him? It's the best.  The best he's ever had.

I think that the same rules apply for your personal monsters.  Something only becomes scary, and horrible when your experience with it has been.  Nightmares, and fears are kind of the opposite of our best, they are our worst.
Gabriel woke up before dawn, hysterical.  He was crying so hard he couldn't catch his breath.  I wasn't sure if he'd bumped his head, or had a bad dream.  I walked to his bed, to find him curled up, with real tears running down his face, eyes still closed tight.  I held him in my arms and asked him what was wrong.  Gabriel tried to catch his breath between sobs and his bottom lip quivered.  He told me he had a bad dream.  His little arm wrapped around my leg, and held on tight.  What was so bad of a nightmare, that it had Gabriel this upset?  Gabriel had a dream that he wanted to eat candy.  His chest quaked as he tried to explain that much, so I told him to save the details. That was enough.  That was enough to teach me that food was Gabriel's monster.  What a thought- that your fear, and dread, comes from something that others love?  I held him a bit tighter, and cried with him for a minute.  He lifted his chin, and set his eyes on me.

 I turned just enough that he couldn't see my tears, smiled real big, and tried to make it better.  I told him that I would make him his toast for breakfast.